Our family has laid to rest the ashes of my father, Tom, today. We drove up to the cemetery at St. Joseph's Catholic church in Kentland Indiana where Dad attended when growing up on the farm. I was also baptized there! It was very cold with lots of clouds and a really strong wind. My cousin Dick had dug the hole for the simple wooden box holding his ashes. Fr. Rob knows the family for over 20 years now and he lead a simple and short service given that we were all freezing and the older ones couldn't leave the cars due to the cold. Dick had to lie down flat on his chest on the ground to lower the box in the hole. Then he and another cousin, Dave, covered it with dirt and I laid a wreath of roses on top of it. I was very touched by their kind service in this last ceremony for Dad. There is something very important in this ritual for me. It brings me back to the central core and purpose of why we are here. As simple and as profound as love.
We all went to a restaurant for lunch afterwards and enjoyed each others company. The Nageles are a big crowd and the conversation and laughter were a great way to get warmed up from the cold. We are very grateful for our family and all who have been with us in prayer and spirit these last days since he went back to God on Nov 6th. We know that Dad now truly rests in peace.
Sunday, 20 November 2016
Tuesday, 15 November 2016
14 November 2016
Greetings to all,
The funeral for my father on Saturday 12 November 2016 was beautiful. I gave the eulogy and managed to keep back the tears until that was over. We had over 100 guests and a lovely meal was provided by the Women of St. Patricks afterwards. I come from a wonderful parish.
Next Saturday we will inter my father's ashes in the cemetery of St. Joseph's Church in Kentland Indiana. This is the church that he attended as a child and where his family is buried. I was also baptized there.
Our family is very grateful to all for the many expressions of sympathy and prayer for us during this time. Dad lived a long life on this earth and is now at peace in the fullness of the love of God.
The funeral for my father on Saturday 12 November 2016 was beautiful. I gave the eulogy and managed to keep back the tears until that was over. We had over 100 guests and a lovely meal was provided by the Women of St. Patricks afterwards. I come from a wonderful parish.
Next Saturday we will inter my father's ashes in the cemetery of St. Joseph's Church in Kentland Indiana. This is the church that he attended as a child and where his family is buried. I was also baptized there.
Our family is very grateful to all for the many expressions of sympathy and prayer for us during this time. Dad lived a long life on this earth and is now at peace in the fullness of the love of God.
Thursday, 10 November 2016
10 November 2016
Greetings from Urbana Illinois, USA. - Feast of St. Leo the Great
I had a good flight from Mombasa and reached our family home at 5pm last night local time (4am on 10th Nov EAT in Kenya). My brother, two sisters and my mother were all here and we had supper together with some food brought to us by a friend from church. There is a lot of food in our house from so many good friends and we are very grateful. When my brother comes from Washington DC with his family on Friday our family will be all together again.
It is now 3am (Noon EAT) 10th November and I have awoken in jet lag. It is a good time to reconnect and let everyone know I have arrived safely. Today we will meet with the priest who will concelebrate at the funeral, Fr. Remm. He has retired officially but knew Dad for over 30 years as well as the family and has been a wonderful pastor through thick and thin. The funeral will be at 11 am on Saturday, with condolences in the church beginning at 10am. My father was cremated and his remains will be interred at the Catholic church cemetery in Kentland Indiana with his parents, siblings and other family members from the homestead and farm.
On the way home I followed the election of the President as best I could. When we landed in Heathrow the Belgian man next to me opened his phone and saw that Trump had won Florida and Ohio. That was when I knew he would be the next president. Once I got through all the security checks and arrived at the final gate I sat down in front of a TV with other Americans watching the news. Trump had only 5 more electoral votes to win. The man to my right was from Georgia, white and in his forties. He was announcing his happiness saying, "That bitch would have killed my son." (I later learned that his son was in the military and took a bullet to his neck and complained that the military didn't have what they needed to do 'the job'.) I just listened. He went on to say that Hilary is a criminal and should be locked up. I said we have a good judicial system and they can take her to court.
He owns 11 guns and has 6000 rounds of ammunition. His wife carries a concealed gun. He was angry that Obama only visited Georgia for one day in 8 years, saying that Obama didn't think that Georgia was good enough to give them more time. I agreed with him that Obama should have found more time to spend in that state. He spent more time in Kenya than one day in eight years. The man on my left was of Pakistani origin who lives in Wisconsin who voted for Trump as well. He was not saying much.
As we sat, the other five electoral votes came in and it was announce that Trump had won. Clinton called him to concede. I reminded them that Trump had said the elections were rigged but neither made any comments. At this point I had only listened and hadn't given my view but was becoming emotional, in part because of the sadness of my father's death. I told them how hurt I felt when Trump used vulgar language about women and called it "locker room banter". I asked them if they, and my brothers, brothers in law, nephews and other men in the US talk so disrespectfully about women when they are in the locker room. The Pakistani man looked at me and said he was sorry. The man from Georgia said that he was brought up in the Bible belt and was taught that even if you think those things you don't say them out loud. I turned to him and said, "I will respect Trump as our president. We have to live together in this country and we have to talk to one another. I have listened to you and I hope that one day you will listen to me. He continued to explain all of the hate and anger that he felt and I could see that he could not see my pain and was not ready to listen to me. I would say that all of us are hurting in some way and we have a lot of work to do to acknowledge our feelings and then be able listen to others and start talking about it.
For you in the US who fear deportation and for you abroad who are wondering what will happen I say, "Be not afraid". Those were the words of advice from our Kenyan Archbishop in his condolences to me. They didn't help with my father's death because our family is at peace and grateful that Dad is with God and no longer suffering. But I remembered them when I was feeling very sad and depressed after these conversations. We, as Americans, have to learn and grow from our challenges and disappointments. It will cause suffering, and innocent suffering, especially for people far removed from our country. Innocent suffering was what I saw every day in South Sudan and I still see it in Kenya. I hope to be one of the people in this world who will listen more and try to reconcile our differences peacefully.
For the next several days I will be away from the computer and with my family. Our whole family feels the love, support and prayers that join you together with us and we are grateful. And for our father, Thomas, may he rest in eternal peace knowing now, full well, the depth of God's love for him.
I had a good flight from Mombasa and reached our family home at 5pm last night local time (4am on 10th Nov EAT in Kenya). My brother, two sisters and my mother were all here and we had supper together with some food brought to us by a friend from church. There is a lot of food in our house from so many good friends and we are very grateful. When my brother comes from Washington DC with his family on Friday our family will be all together again.
It is now 3am (Noon EAT) 10th November and I have awoken in jet lag. It is a good time to reconnect and let everyone know I have arrived safely. Today we will meet with the priest who will concelebrate at the funeral, Fr. Remm. He has retired officially but knew Dad for over 30 years as well as the family and has been a wonderful pastor through thick and thin. The funeral will be at 11 am on Saturday, with condolences in the church beginning at 10am. My father was cremated and his remains will be interred at the Catholic church cemetery in Kentland Indiana with his parents, siblings and other family members from the homestead and farm.
On the way home I followed the election of the President as best I could. When we landed in Heathrow the Belgian man next to me opened his phone and saw that Trump had won Florida and Ohio. That was when I knew he would be the next president. Once I got through all the security checks and arrived at the final gate I sat down in front of a TV with other Americans watching the news. Trump had only 5 more electoral votes to win. The man to my right was from Georgia, white and in his forties. He was announcing his happiness saying, "That bitch would have killed my son." (I later learned that his son was in the military and took a bullet to his neck and complained that the military didn't have what they needed to do 'the job'.) I just listened. He went on to say that Hilary is a criminal and should be locked up. I said we have a good judicial system and they can take her to court.
He owns 11 guns and has 6000 rounds of ammunition. His wife carries a concealed gun. He was angry that Obama only visited Georgia for one day in 8 years, saying that Obama didn't think that Georgia was good enough to give them more time. I agreed with him that Obama should have found more time to spend in that state. He spent more time in Kenya than one day in eight years. The man on my left was of Pakistani origin who lives in Wisconsin who voted for Trump as well. He was not saying much.
As we sat, the other five electoral votes came in and it was announce that Trump had won. Clinton called him to concede. I reminded them that Trump had said the elections were rigged but neither made any comments. At this point I had only listened and hadn't given my view but was becoming emotional, in part because of the sadness of my father's death. I told them how hurt I felt when Trump used vulgar language about women and called it "locker room banter". I asked them if they, and my brothers, brothers in law, nephews and other men in the US talk so disrespectfully about women when they are in the locker room. The Pakistani man looked at me and said he was sorry. The man from Georgia said that he was brought up in the Bible belt and was taught that even if you think those things you don't say them out loud. I turned to him and said, "I will respect Trump as our president. We have to live together in this country and we have to talk to one another. I have listened to you and I hope that one day you will listen to me. He continued to explain all of the hate and anger that he felt and I could see that he could not see my pain and was not ready to listen to me. I would say that all of us are hurting in some way and we have a lot of work to do to acknowledge our feelings and then be able listen to others and start talking about it.
For you in the US who fear deportation and for you abroad who are wondering what will happen I say, "Be not afraid". Those were the words of advice from our Kenyan Archbishop in his condolences to me. They didn't help with my father's death because our family is at peace and grateful that Dad is with God and no longer suffering. But I remembered them when I was feeling very sad and depressed after these conversations. We, as Americans, have to learn and grow from our challenges and disappointments. It will cause suffering, and innocent suffering, especially for people far removed from our country. Innocent suffering was what I saw every day in South Sudan and I still see it in Kenya. I hope to be one of the people in this world who will listen more and try to reconcile our differences peacefully.
For the next several days I will be away from the computer and with my family. Our whole family feels the love, support and prayers that join you together with us and we are grateful. And for our father, Thomas, may he rest in eternal peace knowing now, full well, the depth of God's love for him.
Monday, 7 November 2016
07 November
I will leave Kenya on 8th November and arrive in Bloomington Illinois at 4pm on the 9th November. The funeral for my father will be on Saturday the 12th. Tomorrow at noon Fr. Gabriel will come to the house here in Mombasa to say Mass with two of my friends and myself. Then we'll have lunch and he'll take me to the airport. I am very blessed to have such good friends and wonderful support.
Sunday, 6 November 2016
06 November
 |
| Genevra, John, Dad, Phil, Susan, Anne...June 2016 |
THOMAS EUGENE NAGELE
May 4, 1923 to Nov 6, 2016
May 4, 1923 to Nov 6, 2016
I have two tires with dirt and plants in them on the roof landing where I live. They have been producing big tomatoes and several squash these past few weeks. The plants just grow out of the compost. Such abundance is unusual. This morning at 5am I went to water the plants and found a small white lily had bloomed...a bit unusual since it is so dry. And now, six hours later I have learned that my father has gone back to God.
 |
| Dad and Steve Nagele Reunion July 2015 |
Dad
grew up on a farm in Sheldon Illinois but he left to become a dentist and raise
his family in Urbana Illinois a couple of hours away from the farm. I
would often go with him on weekends to visit and I would spend a couple of
weeks each summer at Grandma Nagele's as Grandpa had passed on when I was very
little. I loved being in the country, watching the fields fill up with
food. The land was flat as a pancake but it was beautiful because it was
part of our home.
When
Dad retired he rarely spoke of dentistry again. He always spoke about the
crops, listened to the farm report and went up to visit whenever he could.
So it seems good to have a white lily blooming among the tomatoes and
squash this morning to honor him.
Dad
cherished his family and we had several Nagele reunions, the last in July 2015,
which he was able to attend. We all enjoyed ourselves immensely.
Dad also valued education, especially of girls. I remember him
telling me I could do anything I wanted to do. And I have...with his
help. I will travel to Illinois in a couple of days to be with my family,
cherish our memories and lay him to rest, now that he is happy with God.
May he rest in peace.
 |
| Mom and Dad with the soy beans They were married for over 61 years. |
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